Who do you or did you care for?   

I, along with my two younger sisters cared for my mother, when she was ill with bi-polar disorder.

What sorts of things do you help with?   

As I was the eldest, the responsibility of looking after my sisters, when Mum was in hospital often fell on my shoulders. It involved organising the shopping, cleaning and cooking. I also was in charge of getting all of us out to hospital to visit Mum. My mother would be hospitalized when it wasn't safe for her to be at home. I'd look out for the warning signs, the manic behaviour, the lack of sleep. I suppose often I took on the "mothering" role for the family. At the time it didn't seem like a big deal. We were also very lucky to have supportive friends around who would keep an eye out for us. Also, mums' illness is episodic, so there were plenty of times when she was well and able to look after us !

What are / were some of the best things about caring?  

The best thing about caring was the added responsibility gave me confidence and strength to tackle many issues in my own life. I know I wouldn't be the person I am today without the challenges I faced early on.

What are / were some of the things that were hard?   

The hardest thing, was I wanted someone to look after me.. There were times when I'd think "this isn't fair, why is this happening to my family". I'd have to admit there were times when I felt resentful.

How did you cope when times were tough?   

I coped because I loved my mum and my sisters. We became very close and that support helped all of us through. I love to have a laugh, see the light side, and I know having a giggle helped me enormously.

How did you look after yourself?   

Luckily, as I said, there were plenty of times when Mum was well, so she was able to care for us. Also, we would go and stay with our Dad when we were little, and mum was in hospital for months up to time.

How do you relax?    

To relax, time with friends was great. Like many teenagers, we would get up to mischief ! Not that I recommend that, but a lot of my adolescence I faced the same issues of boys, pimples, peer pressure and wanting to fit in.

Who do you / did you get support from?

I got support from my younger sisters, and family friends. We were lucky to have understanding people around us, who didn't judge.

What's your greatest achievement?   

I don't think I have a greatest achievement yet !! But I'd like to think that living well and being happy and looking for the good in life is what I've so far, been able to achieve.

Where do you gather strength from?   

I get strength from my mother. Her courage and determination during tough times still sustains me.

An embarrassing moment?    

I was never embarrassed by mums' illness. I still feel frustrated though, and helpless.. I wish I had a magic wand to make her pain and sadness go away.

If you had some advice for other young carers, what would it be?   

I'm in awe of what so many young people have to confront and live with, day by day. I was lucky that I had plenty of support around me. My advice would be, just be proud of what you're doing. The courage and strength you have makes you extraordinary young people! Also, don't be afraid to ask for help.. you don't always have to strong, try to find someone you can lean on.

Jessica Rowe - My Best Times